♥ cedar ♥

Here am I..

2010-06-23T22:12:00.001+08:00

It's been ages since my last blogpost. Good thing, my phone has gprs,so in this far place, i can still connect to the world! It's been a month and 6 days since i left to Surigao del Norte but it feels like a year. I miss home. Yes my home..with my sibs and my parents..i miss home..i miss my home church, the brethren. <br> Despite this clinging emotions I praise God because Hebrews 13:5 is becoming real to me. He is faithful and abounding in love and mercy. And He has a plan. I can't see the big picture now but i know that I just have to trust Him. For He knows what He is doing. I pray that through His grace, ill be able to obey Him moment by moment. Lord have Your way in me! And Lord, take me deeper! <br>God bless you today :)

For you my Ate..

2009-10-08T18:19:00.000+08:00

“Accepted in the beloved.” - Eph_1:6

2009-09-23T13:33:00.001+08:00

What a state of privilege! It includes our justification before God, but the term “acceptance” in the Greek means more than that. It signifies that we are the objects of divine complacence, nay, even of divine delight. How marvellous that we, worms, mortals, sinners, should be the objects of divine love! But it is only “in the beloved.” Some Christians seem to be accepted in their own experience, at least, that is their apprehension. When their spirit is lively, and their hopes bright, they think God accepts them, for they feel so high, so heavenly-minded, so drawn above the earth! But when their souls cleave to the dust, they are the victims of the fear that they are no longer accepted. If they could but see that all their high joys do not exalt them, and all their low despondencies do not really depress them in their Father’s sight, but that they stand accepted in One who never alters, in One who is always the beloved of God, always perfect, always without spot or wrinkle, or any such thing, how much happier they would be, and how much more they would honour the Saviour! Rejoice then, believer, in this: thou art accepted “in the beloved.” Thou lookest within, and thou sayest, “There is nothing acceptable here!” But look at Christ, and see if there is not everything acceptable there. Thy sins trouble thee; but God has cast thy sins behind his back, and thou art accepted in the Righteous One. Thou hast to fight with corruption, and to wrestle with temptation, but thou art already accepted in him who has overcome the powers of evil. The devil tempts thee; be of good cheer, he cannot destroy thee, for thou art accepted in him who has broken Satan’s head. Know by full assurance thy glorious standing. Even glorified souls are not more accepted than thou art. They are only accepted in heaven “in the beloved,” and thou art even now accepted in Christ after the same manner.

-Charles Spurgeon

God is my Healer

2009-09-10T13:47:00.001+08:00

Praise God! He is Jehovah Rafa... My Refuge, Strength and Ever Present Help. Benign ang result ng biopsy. God is faithful! Hallelujah! Thanks to your prayers... Please pray for continued healing. God bless you! :)

The Christian Alphabet

2009-07-24T20:29:00.006+08:00

This poem by an anonymous author was shared to me by a very dear sister and truly it encouraged me. And actually, i have a copy at home which I discovered way back a month or two. it's great to be reminded of that poem. :> it's something that you can hang around the house. it was a present to my sister and i'm sure it's from papemelroti.

Although things are not perfect
Because of trial or pain
Continue in thanksgiving
Do not begin to blame
Even when the times are hard
Fierce winds are bound to blow
God is forever able
Hold on to what you know
Imagine life without His love
Joy would cease to be
Keep thanking Him for all the things
Love imparts to thee
Move out of "Camp Complaining"
No weapon that is known
On earth can yield the power
Praise can do alone
Quit looking at the future
Redeem the time at hand
Start every day with worship
To "thank" is a command
Until we see Him coming
Victorious in the sky
We'll run the race with gratitude
Xalting God most high
Yes, therell be good times & yes some will be bad, but...
Zion waits in glory...where none are ever sad!

While I'm Waiting

2009-04-28T22:05:00.000+08:00

by John Waller

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Takeing every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord

Fireproof . The Cross

2009-04-20T13:30:00.002+08:00

thanks to ella, zi and the rest of their cg for sharing with us the movie 'fireproof'! Been so blessed! Praise the Lord!

John 4:19
Thank You Lord for Your love..

God's love

2009-04-02T21:30:00.002+08:00

Thank you Lord for Your love..

YOU ARE DRAWING ME ON

2009-03-01T00:45:00.005+08:00

YOU ARE DRAWING ME ON TOWARD

MOUNT ZION,

YOU ARE DRAWING ME TO YOUR

DWELLING PLACE.

MAY MY NAME BE ENGRAVED ON THE

GATES OF THAT CITY.

LEAD ME TO MOUNT ZION, LORD,

BY YOUR GRACE.

from Worship in Zion album (http://zion.ph/mp3.html)

moving past injustices

2009-02-08T16:18:00.001+08:00

how do you move past the injustices inflicted to you? only by His grace.

I Live to Know You

2008-12-16T18:01:00.003+08:00

Standing in Your presence
Lord my heart and life are changed
Just to love You and to live to
See Your beauty and Your grace

Heaven and earth cry out Your name
Nations rise up and see Your face
And Your kingdom is established
As I live to know You more

Now I will never be the same
Spirit of God, my life You've changed
And I'll forever sing Your praise
I live to know You Lord
I live to know You Lord

You've called me
I will follow
Your will for me I'm sure
Let Your heart beat
Be my heart's cry
Let me live to serve Your call

Heaven and earth cry out Your name
Nations rise up and see Your face
And Your kingdom is established
As I live to know You more

Now I will never be the same
Spirit of God, my life You've changed
And I'll forever sing Your praise
I live to know You Lord
I live to know You Lord

I Live To Know You - Hillsong Music Australia

just disney

2008-12-13T00:39:00.003+08:00

hihihi! saw this free-standing backdrop of mickey and minnie with a house @ d' lower ground of sm centerpoint. naaliw ako, kaya nagpichur ako. hahaha! puro mga toddlers nagpapapichur dun.. natuwa lang ako.. 'click'.. ^.^

may christmas party kasi sila 'te kay. costume party actually at ang theme ay disney, so she got this costume. at talagang c guia pa ang naunang nagsuot. i also tried it, cute eh.. pero di ko ipopost un pic. wahahaha! thanks to Gen (my sis's officemate) it's so nice of her to fix the polka dot skirt and headband with ribbon and exaggerated minnie ears for 'te kay. ayaw kc ni ate magprincess-princessan. di daw bagay sa personality nya. nyahahaha! cute though! :p

your teachers will be hidden no more

2008-12-05T06:56:00.000+08:00

I remember, I heard a preacher say that, "when God gives a promise, sometimes you have to prepare for the exact opposite to come your way". True enough in the lives of the children of Israel, they were called out of Egypt, delivered from the hands of the pharaoh and given the promised land. A land flowing with milk and honey. But to their dismay, they were led to the wilderness -- the exact opposite of a fruitful and bountiful land. It was to test them if they will obey the Lord and to know what is really in their hearts. The people had to qualify to inherit the promise.

God may have given you a promise but why is it like becoming the other way around? The Lor5d said to His people, His treasured possessions:

20 Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. 21 Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."

Isaiah 30:20-21 NKJV

Now, it's like the Lord had hidden His teachers from me. I am so hungry and thirsty. But I will trust in His Word because His Word is life. Sometimes, the opposite had just to come. But I know the Lord is gracious and faithful to fulfill His promises.

Lord, Let Your will be done!

Raise up Your teachers of righteousness.

That eyes may see and Your teachers will no longer be hidden!

Parang nangyari na 'to!

2008-12-04T09:58:00.002+08:00

Actually, hindi *parang*. Haha! I am here in testing room. Akalain mu! I am taking kfc employment elimination exam. Haha! Yes you read it right. I resigned from my position as CADD operator last March. And here I am, taking the exam. Reapplying ba.. Farthest from my mind that I will try to return pero heto.. I am applying for project superintendent job. Yes! That's right. I need to to have job experience in regards to site supervision, proj. mngt., construction mngt.. Hayy.. Buhayy.. Akalain mu! Parang nangyari na 'to!

:(

2008-12-02T20:35:00.005+08:00

As i mentioned in my last entry, i got home to nueva ecija with my mom and sis.

Something happened..

in one of the conversations, my mom happened to mention about the current condition of someone in our community. He is Mang Emio. I learned that he acquired cancer of the lungs. When they brought him to the hospital it was discovered that there was nothing else the doctors could do. The cancer was already on its 4th stage. This family man is so pitiful. He could no longer breathe without oxygen tank. He couldnt eat even he wanted too. And her wife went door to door in the community to ask for help, any amount to sustain his oxygen. Their family is one of the poorest in the place. There are many people in our community suffering in poverty.

my heart was really burdened. Burdened to share the gospel.. It was really heavy. When i and my sister prayed for him and their family at our home i couldnt help but cry.my goes out for them. How can he die without hearing the gospel. Without receiving it?

i expressed to my mom my desire to share the gospel. But she hastily disagreed because of the sickness of mang Emio. She said that tubeculli is dangerous and contagious. I didnt have the resources to research about the disease. However i cannot disobey my mom.i felt like my heart was crushed. Crushed for the condition of mang emio, physically and spiritually; the many people in our town who dont know the good news; the bondage of poverty that looms in the lives of the people; and the thought that my parents and immediate relatives dont live a victorious life.

i read in ezekiel 3:18, when i say to the wicked, you shall surely die, and give him no warning, nor speak to warn the wicked from his wicked way, to save his life, that same wicked man shall die in his iniquity;but his blood i will require at your hand.

how many times have i been complacent and lax to share the gospel?my heart was really heavy.i thought, i could share the gospel to his wife instead and i could encourage her to share it to mang emio.

Mang emio is a good artist. He really draws well. i remember when I was young, there was a time i asked him to draw my project for me. the drawings were the national icons like Jose Rizal, as the national hero; carabao, the national cattle; sipa, the national sport and so on. He only used pencil but i was really amazed with his talent. i wanted to be as good as him in drawing.

that is the only time i remember i ever talked to mang Emio. *drawing projects*. that time he is already a heavy smoker. i guess it is also his smoking that cause his illness. but it can also be caused of chemicals that he might have inhaled. Mang Emio works as a farmer. He grows vegetable plants in 'tumana' and i learned that he used chemicals to repel pests. insecticide and many of the agricultural chemicals are really hazardous plus the fact that mang Emio does not have the necessary gears to protect himself.

When my mom went to mang Emio's house, I and my sister followed her. She went there because my ate gave her some money to give to mang Emio's wife. there it was.. the appointed time.. to share the good news of salvation and pray for them. when my mom finished conversing with aling emmy (mang emio's wife) she asked us if we have anything to say. i and my ate looked at each other twice..glanced at each other. but my sis didnt make a move.

And i was not even making a move too!

My mom shared to aling emmy that we are christians. because of the present situation (there were some unfamiliar people in their house) i grew timid to even speak. i dont understand but i couldnt start. How ironic. our mom said we are christians but we couldnt/didnt do as a christian is supposed to.

i was not able to share the gospel. i was not able to pray for them.

then i was reminded, Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2:15
7For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7
I was not able to share His love. I was so dejected. How could i just walk out?

I prayed for forgiveness. But until now, the words in ezekiel echoes in my ears. I know that He is faithful and just to forgive me. But I also have to really forgive myself.

Saturday ended, Sunday came, I had to travel back to manila... mainly because of the cellgroup fellowship. i just now realized that it should be 'mainly' because of the Lord. I was asking God, 'was that the appointed time'. I asked God that in His sovereign will, may he give me a chance to share.

while still reflecting, in the jeepney going to FFA, i received a text from my ate. She broke the news that Mang Emio passed away. i was overtaken by grief; not only of his death but also my falling short of His grace. when i got the chance to be alone, i coudnt help but sob. I wonder where is mang Emio right now...

*wasak ako* as i may term it. i didnt know how i would attend the service. i didnt know how i would meet my cellgroupmates. maybe it is also God's will that no one came in the CG time. because i was not ok.

How urgent it is to respond, to obey to the promptings of the Holy Spirit to share the gospel. i remebered Isaiah 61 and realized that the heart of Jesus goes out for people who are dead apart from him.

He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. 2 Peter 3:9

1 The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners, [a]
Isaiah 61:1

patience is a virtue

2008-12-01T00:14:00.005+08:00

Dear Jesus,

Got back here in Manila today because i have to meet the cellgroup. I was planning to stay in the province until tomorrow because of the holiday but i realized that i have a responsibility as one of the leaders now of the group.

So I traveled back to the city. I learned later from the two (among the consistent members) that they could not attend the cg. With valid reasons. So after the service we dined out together and parted ways. In the restaurant i found two other members of the cg. I asked if they received my texts informing them about the cg and yes they did get it. But... When i asked if they will attend, the first one said that she is going to rest at home. The second one cant seem to answer or make up her mind. I dont get it. My two lunchdates told me that these ladies will attend but unfortunately seems the opposite. I texted the all the cg peeps on saturday so i decided to hang around the church lobby, so i can immediately see if someone is coming. There, i was alone. Things were so different. Many things have changed. Anyway, later, saw this ate.. chat with her for a while then she told me she is going home. I therefore conclude, she couldn't come(and i was right). Then another showed up and told me he is busy with a lot of things (though he doesnt seem to be busy at all. He was just loitering).

Waited there.. An hour.. Then two..

No one.. Nothing..

no one came.nothing beeped.

No one showed up. Been holding my phone the whole time but no one bothered to text. *SIGH*

Lord what are you teaching me?

I remembered Rev.Bailey speak on leadership. One virtue that a leader have to possess is PATIENCE. I remembered his story. In Africa, people think that the pastor is the perfection of that virtue. They were inconsistent with attendance and when they come back they expect the pastor to understand and welcome them with open arms.

Such time, you would desire the virtue you dont have.

Lord, i pray that through your grace id be patient and faithful. You are my example. Time and time again your disciples failed you but you have such a heart for people. You are merciful. Lord thank you because when I turn to you I can do all things through You alone who gives me strength. I can be all things to men so that I can be better. I praise You Lord.

Getting Ready For The Last Days - Rev. Yang Tuck Yoong

2008-11-22T20:50:00.003+08:00

Scripture References

Matthew 24:3-14; 25:1-10
Daniel 7:25
Ephesians 6:11-13
Jeremiah 12:5
Hebrews 10:24-25
2 Peter 1:2-12
Isaiah 40:29-31; 26:9-10
Zechariah 12:8
Judges 6:12
Romans 5:17

Sermon Synopsis

We are told by none other than the Lord Himself that the last days would be so difficult that if He did not intervene, the very existence of humanity will be at stake. Lawlessness and violence would be everywhere; wars and rumors of war, pestilences, earthquakes, famines etc. The earth itself will undergo birth pangs and everything that can be shaken will be shaken. So what can we do to prepare ourselves for the dark days ahead? This message provides 6 keys to start preparing ourselves to stand in tough times.

messengers of hope - brian bailey

2008-11-13T22:55:00.001+08:00

...

2008-11-10T21:37:00.002+08:00

...we are living in an age when people (like me) seeks to be entertained...
...may the Lord change our hearts...

Let Your Spirit Fall Here - Ed Kerr

2008-11-10T16:51:00.000+08:00

We humbly seek Your face
We trust You hear our cry
Come touch the barren places
So many here are dry
Fill every hungry heart
Heal every wounded soul
Have mercy Lord revive us
Come make Your presence known

 Let Your Spirit fall here
Wind from Heaven blow
Purify our hearts today
Fire of Heaven glow
Manifest Your glory
Boldly now we call
Nothing else will satisfy
Let Your Spirit fall

 Our hearts are full of faith
And all Your wonders will be seen
When all we truly long for
Is resting at Your feet
The door is open wide
And our striving has no place
Give us a revelation
Lord let us see Your face

 
 Let Your Spirit fall here
Wind from Heaven blow
Purify our hearts today
Fire of Heaven glow
Manifest Your glory
Boldly now we call
Nothing else will satisfy
Manifest Your glory
Boldly now we call
Nothing else will satisfy
Let Your Spirit fall
Nothing else will satisfy
Let Your Spirit fall

..In The Secret..

2008-11-06T08:31:00.001+08:00

..Mercy Me..

In the secret,
In the quiet place
in the stillness you are there
In the secret in the quite hour I wait, only for you
Cause i want to know you more

In the secret
In the quite place
In the stillnes you are there
In the secret in the quiet hour I wait
Because i want to know you more

Chorus
I want to know you
I want to hear your voice
I want to know you more
I want to touch you
I want to see your face
I want to know you more

I am reaching for the highest goals
That i might recive the prize
Pressing onward
Pushing every hinderance aside
Out of my way
Cause i want to know you more

Chorus x2

in the seceret in the quite place
in the stillness you are there

Chorus x2

<><
In The Secret
Mercy Me
Key: G major

G c
In the secret in the quiet place
Em D c
In the stillness You are there
G c
In the secret in the quiet hour i wait

Only for You 'cause
Em D c
I want to know You more

G D
I want to know You
Em c
i want to hear Your voice
Em D c
I want to know You more
G D
I want to touch You
Em c
I want to see Your face
G D c
I want to know You more

I am reaching for the highest goal
That i might recieve the prize
Pressing onward, pushing every hindrance aside
Out of my way 'cause i want to know You more

..namissed ko lang..

2008-11-04T17:55:00.005+08:00

namissed ko lang ang cell group bigla.. ^.^

To Worship My King

2008-11-04T17:51:00.000+08:00

I tried to improvise.. sort of trial and error.

And here's what i've come up to..

i don't know if these are the right chords

and the exact lyrics of the song

but i praise God, He enabled me..

it's the very cry of my heart..

More of You Oh, Lord

A D

Who shall ascend to the hill of the Lord?

A D

Who shall abide where He dwells?

A D

Those who are cleansed, with hearts that are pure

A D

Are called to come in through the veil

F#m A

Oh, how I long to look at Your face

D A

To be in the place where You are

F#m A

This is my one and only desire

D E

This is the cry of my heart

A D

More of You oh, Lord

A D

More of You oh, Lord

F#m E

My heart longs for nothing else

D E

But more of You oh, Lord

A D

More of You oh, Lord

A D

More of You oh, Lord

F#m E

My heart longs for nothing else

D A

But more of You oh, Lord

F#m A

Just as the deer seeks after the stream

D A

So is my soul for You Lord

F#m A

Only one thing that satisfies me

D E

Only one thing makes me whole

Ps 127:1a

2008-11-02T13:30:00.000+08:00

The Lord had given me this verse twice today:

Unless the LORD builds the house,
its builders labor in vain.
Ps 127:1a

Amen. Praise God!

God's will not mine

2008-11-01T17:46:00.000+08:00

Got convicted.. God has been dealing with me in relation to my choices.. Praise God!

Worldly Planning
TGIF Today God Is First Volume 1 by Os Hillman
Saturday, November 01 2008

"Or do I make my plans in a worldly manner so that in the same breath I say, 'Yes, yes' and 'No, no'?" 2 Corinthians 1:17

The apostle Paul was discussing his plans to come to the church at Corinth. He was acknowledging the serious nature of his trip and informing the Corinthians that he did not flippantly come to this decision to visit them. It was a matter that had been given serious prayer, not one made in the spur of the moment.

Planning from God's view is a process. It isn't merely an exercise in reason and analysis. It requires entering into the mind of Christ together with our minds to determine which course to take. In the Old Testament, the priests wore breastplates with the Urim and Thummim in a pouch on their breasts. It was like a roll of dice that the priests were required to perform to know which direction they were to take on a matter. It was the ultimate release of all decisions into God's hand. God did not want the priests to rely on their own intellects for final decisions.

We have an uncanny ability to make decisions based on our own needs and wants. However, God desires that we seek Him to know His plans for us. David was a skilled warrior who never lost a battle. He consulted God on every decision. He knew the results of the battle rested in God's hand. So, if he was to gain victory, he had to know God's mind on the matter. Sometimes this requires more time given to the process in order to hear His voice. Sometimes it may even require fasting and prayer. Sometimes it may require input from other godly friends.

Are you a man or woman who makes decisions based on God's purposes for your life? Do you take every major decision and put it before the throne to determine God's mind on the matter? If so, you will avoid making decisions in a worldly manner.

.. fall on us ..

2008-11-01T09:53:00.003+08:00

Holy Spirit, come in power

Change my heart

I want to live for you my God

Holy Spirit, come in power

Change my life

I want to live for you my Lord

Fall on us Lord..

<><

The Power of Earnest Prayer - Brian Bailey

2008-10-09T18:02:00.000+08:00

excerpt

2008-09-17T12:06:00.002+08:00

The blight of the Pharisee's heart in olden times was doctrine without love. We are safe only when the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost, only when our intellects are indwelt by the loving Fire that came at Pentecost.

*Divine Conquest, A. W. Tozer*

Blast from the past...

2008-09-10T17:00:00.003+08:00

Rainy day, just stayed home and looked at my old stuff in my desk cabinet. As i browsed my old journal, a certain entry took my attention.

at the rear part of my journal (where i used to scribble bible passages or random messages that spoke to me) i found this:

God shields us from most things we fear, but when He chooses not to shield us, He unfailingly allots grace in the measure needed. It's for us to choose to receive or refuse it. Our joy or misery will depend on that choice.

*Elizabeth Elliot, Secure in His Everlasting Arms

it ministered to me...

today..

in a different light..

praise God!

Random thoughts

2008-09-10T00:01:00.002+08:00

many times when i exhort someone with the Word of God, it is like i am saying those things to myself..
--*--
and just now i shared the scripture with a friend who is going throuh something, but the very Words are more like for me. Convicted!
--*--
i just remembered, in the cell group last sunday, it was shared that one can go through tests and trials (wilderness?!) without being changed. One can just merely go through suffering but not transformed.
--*--
last tgif, i didnt want to come. I decided not to go. But i wrestled against the discouragement and laziness. I attended. I realized that the more i dont want to come to church the more i should..
--*--
praise God i attended. I was prayed for by my cg leader. And she prayed that God will remove my doubts. I told myself, maybe that is what God impressed to her..
--*--
and then, last sun, the pastor preached on what he termed relapse-onia. It is when bad habits, hang-ups and bondages find its way back to the person.. Got convicted my heart but i did not respond at the altar call. Pride got in the way. But when i saw people coming to the altar, i finally rose up and knelt down at the altar. I was humbled. It had to cause people to come first before i made a move.
--*--
i was prayed for by the youth pastor. She prayed that i will not be confused, that i will only listen to God. She prayed that He will take away my doubts. Yes! For the second time, for the record. So i really have doubt issue?
--*--
yesterday i received a text message about the doubts of the human soul. This is really something. Is God trying to say something?
--*--
im starting to ask myself, what it is i am doubting. 3 times is significant isnt it?
--*--
the challenge in this wilderness experience is what will be my attitude. Will i still pursue Him? Will i grumble? Will i resort to other things as a substitute for God? Will i rebel and harden my heart? Will i wallow in unbelief?
--*--
dear Lord, cultivate in me a heart that chases after Thee. May i be changed by Your grace.

fix my eyes on Jesus..

2008-09-04T22:17:00.004+08:00

Hebrews 12:1-21 Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Psalm 27:4One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.

I fix my eyes on You
I fix my eyes on You
The author of my faith
Casting aside
Every sin and every weight
I fix my eyes on You
I lay my burdens down
Letting the cares
Of this world now fade away

One thing I ask
This one thing I seek
That I may dwell in Your house
O Lord my King
All the days of my life
I want to gaze upon Your beauty
And seek You in this holy place

All the days of my life
I want to gaze upon Your beauty
And seek You in this holy place

Words and Music by Tommy Walker, Bob Wilson

My Testimony

2008-08-26T22:21:00.008+08:00

Last July 7-11, i attended a class offered by MZCF. It was a series of teaching on the life of Peter and Paul. The entire week was a blessing to me. The classes were offered primarily for the students of MZCF but thank God, I was invited by my cell leader. On the last day of the series, we were asked to write a testimony of our life in relation to what was studied. The paper was to be submitted on the first day of the next series (which was Pneumatology) by the month of August. Unfortunately I was not able to pass the paper. However, i still wrote a testimony of my life...

3 The voice of one crying in the wilderness:

“Prepare the way of the LORD;
Make straight in the desert[a]
A highway for our God.
4 Every valley shall be exalted
And every mountain and hill brought low;

Isaiah 40:3-4 (New King James Version)

I came to know the Lord on year 2003 and since then my life was never the same. Little by little, God is exposing and dealing many issues in my life. There are areas in my life which are like valleys that need to be lifted up by the Lord. There are also mountains that need to be leveled down so God can use me for His glory.

Through the life of Peter and Paul that was discussed in the series, I learned how names can tell so much about a person, his character or calling in life. Peter – God wanted to make him a rock. Paul – God made him little so that he can serve Him. Not long ago, I discovered that my name has a meaning. My father gave me my name but he didn’t know what it meant. I learned that my name “Erez” is a Hebrew word that means cedar. I know God did not give me my name for nothing but He has a mark set for me. When I researched about cedar, it has characteristics that are so "not me". But God made me realize that He is faithful and nothing is impossible for Him. He can make me live up for my name as He leads me. As of now, I continue to ask God what are His callings for me. And as a “cedar” for Him, what does He want me to do.

Like Peter I had ugly characters which are like splinters that God wants to be removed. I used to be impulsive and quick tempered. I remember when I was in college and even when I graduated and started to work, I used to flare up easily when conversations turn sour over religion. But God dealt with me and taught me to be gentle; to be an approved workman who is not ashamed to tell the word of truth but with gentleness. I realized that I can’t rely on myself to change but only to God. Only by His grace I may come to repentance. There are still times I act impulsively but now I rely on God’s grace not on my own effort to change. There were times I was tested, and I praise God that He enabled me to choose my battles and to act in kindness and humility. I know all my life I would need His grace to respond, act and speak not by impulse but by His wisdom.

Over time, God revealed many issues in my life. I have committed so many sins in my life but He is patient to take me up again. There were ways I used to take and I did not find anything wrong with them. But as God called my attention and drew me nearer and nearer to Him, He convicted my heart to change my ways and come into light. There was a time when I did not come to work and availed the sick leave benefit even I was not really sick. But God convicted me of my sin. I struggled and wanted to hide it because I thought, everyone is doing it. And it won’t hurt to lie a bit. But he convicted me of my sin. He caused me to confess to my authorities. God is holy and He wants His people to be holy too. At first I refused to obey but He showed me that I was trying to protect my reputation as a Christian but I had no integrity. There is freedom in obeying God. When i talked to my superior about what I've done he forgave me and he even told me that he was blessed. I was surprised that he praised God because I came into the light.

As a Christian, I asked for forgiveness when I accepted Jesus in my life. But God has further work to do in me. Little by little, God made me understand that He will scrutinize every area of my life. Even my long forgotten sins, He started to remind me. He made me realize that it does not end in salvation upon receiving Christ. The Holy Spirit of God will bring to remembrance the past sins and convict my heart to surrender my all to Him. He wants me to live in the light. He wants me to be free. There were areas in my life that God exposed. Last year, I joined the young adults retreat and during that time God dealt with my repeated sins. He brought me to repentance. God wanted to deliver me from my bondages and oppression. God used people to deliver me.

There was a time when I was in the music ministry and had to quit. I submitted to discipline when I fell into sin while I was in tne ministry. I was convicted of my sins one day that I stopped singing for back up at services. God taught me reverence for His temple. I just realized that like Peter, I've stumbled many times and committed horrible sins. But how great is His mercy that He never let me go. Through the grace of the Lord I came to restoration. I remember the word given to my discipler...

13Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14

The grace of God is sufficient. The Lord did not allow that my heart will be hardened. But He had given me the strength to come into the open. And He provided grace that I might be healed. I and my discipler eventually came to the worship team pastor and said everything that had happened. I was assured of forgiveness and prayed for. And since the Lord was signaling my discipler and me that my discipline period was through, my pastor assured me that I can come back to the ministry. Indeed, forgetting what lies behind.. fixing my eyes on Lord Jesus! Amen!

Another time, God dealt with me when I resigned from work. I left my work even I did not really heard a word of approval from God. I was perplexed because I wanted to resign to review for board exam but a part of me didn’t want to because God might want me to stay and minister to the people in the workplace. I resigned and it was more likely motivated by fear, weariness, and impatience.

God apprehended me. He led me to John 21:15-19. He showed me that my love for Him was in the natural aspect. I was grieved when I realized that my love for God is love that emanates from the natural self. He showed me that my desire to stay at work is not motivated by love but by my wrong thinking. I thought I can do great things for God but in the end I disappointed him and went my own way. He told me that my love for Him is seen in the genuineness of my love for others and not in the number of ministries I can do for Him. I learned that if I did not love, it would profit me nothing. I cried when I saw my selfishness and fallenness. God restored me. He also brought me into restoration with my employer whom I had conflict due to my abrupt resignation. There were consequences for my wrong decisions but I yielded in His mercy.

Eventually, there were other things that started to unfold. I quit my job to take the board exam because I wanted to have another thing to hold on to – the title "architect". But God taught me humility. Even I became a Christian I still have in me the rotten nature and pride. Actually, I even became self-righteous. It made me judge other people quickly and argue with others regarding the born again faith.

I abruptly resigned to prepare for the board exam only to find out that I won’t be able to take it. I got convicted that I still lack some requirements. The pre-requisite was to take post baccalaureate, diversified working experience and there were fields of practice that corresponds to hours. The hours requirement totals to two years of work. I worked for more than two years but did not really pass through all the field of practice. I was planning to divert some hours of a field to another, to adjust my logbook. God convicted me that I should not do that because that is deception and cheating. I was not able to take the exam. I didn’t get convicted at the start. I thought I was doing okay because others are doing the same. It was like a norm. But God told me that the world is not my standard of holiness. I should not go with the flow. I lost the opportunity to take the exam. But praise God, He convicted my heart and enabled me to obey Him. I wasted time and resources. I was so unhappy and depressed. But God restored me and assured me of forgiveness and purpose for my life.

Like Saul, there were mountains in my life that needed to be brought low. I never regarded my self as prideful but the Lord showed me the things that I kept holding onto. When I was in primary and secondary, I obtained honors and since then, I was like always trying to maintain something. It is not wrong to study well but I became grade conscious that my academic performance became my indicator for my security. I was not saved then. As a college student, I was a regular student. Deep inside me, I was filled with pride. When no one else is looking, in my inmost thoughts I told myself, “I never had a failing mark. Many of my classmates are failing unlike me”. I have always looked at myself as a smart person. I was also proud of my talents. I love to hear people praise me when they hear my voice as I sing and when i get remarkable grades. I was a "praise-of-men-hungry-creature".

God is good. He humbled me. I had to go through painful situations. I learned that God is not looking for the bright, talented, consistent and boastful but he takes the "broken one". It took me a while to understand. I learned that my natural abilities can really perform for God but He will not be glorified. I can use all that I have but will not produce long lasting fruits. The things that I thought God would be glad to use for His glory are the very things I lost. Many times he showed me how my human wisdom fails. I can only rely on the Holy Spirit to understand God’s words.

I lost my opportunities, my ministry, and my job. But I trust God that He has a plan for my life. He is my only hope. I stand by the grace of God. Now, I will admit that I don’t know yet what God has in store for me but I trust God that He will reveal in time. In this season, I praise God for how he had worked in my life. I know He is not done with me yet. There are still mountains and valleys. Deliverance is a lifestyle. As I draw to God closer and closer I know I will be more and more exposed to His light and my filth will show. But I believe that God is my salvation and healer. He will save me and heal me and cleanse me from my iniquities until the day of the complete redemption in Christ. God wants me to be transformed into a vessel of honor fit for the Master’s use. It's not about me.. It's all about Him! All for His glory!

Seek His Face Not His Hand

2008-08-22T21:38:00.007+08:00

been a long time since the last blog..

i would like to share one of my past devotions when God really spoke to me..

August 3, 2008

Last Thursday night, I came to the Lord in prayer and I told the Lord, "Lord, bring me to seek Your face and not Your hand"...

But after dropping that line, I was grieved and I told the Lord that I do not know what that means. I asked Him to reveal it to me. I was convicted that sometimes I pray without really understanding what I am saying. Sometimes, my prayers were just full of words.. but void of meaning..

The Lord is full of grace and mercy. As I cried to Him, He gave me Matthew 14. In the story, Jesus withdrew from the people and the disciples and He went to some other place to pray. When dawn came, He returned to the disciples, walking on water.

Seeing Him, the disciples got scared and thought he was a ghost. But He said, "It is I". Then Peter said to Him that if it is really Him, "tell me to come to you on the water."

"Come," Jesus said.

Peter jumped out of the boat and started walking on water. But when He saw the big waves, he feared and started to sink. Then he cried out, "Lord, save me!" Jesus stretched out His hand and lifted up Peter. Jesus said, "You of little faith. why did you doubt?"

Then God revealed to me; time comes in my life when Jesus says "come" and He invites me to walk towards Him, to draw nearer and nearer. There were times when the Lord just invites me to walk with Him in my life. And every step, the nearer I get, the more I behold the majesty, beauty and presence of the Lord. But the road I take in life is not always an easy and smooth journey. there were times when the road was bumpy that I stumbled. there were times when the Lord would just tell me to keep on walking in faith even it would mean walking on water. there were times when big waves come and threaten me, scare me and prevent me from pressing on. there were times when the waves and turbulence crashed over me and i started to sink. Praise be to God that He was there to give a hand.

But I realized, the big waves looked big when i started looking at them intently and kept my focus away from Jesus. Peter started to sink when He looked at the waves and grew afraid. The strong wind and big waves took his eyes away from looking unto Jesus. He lost his focus. That is why he panicked. He did not trust Jesus until the end. He could choose to trust God to save Him. He forgot that He would not perish because Jesus is the Son of God, the Lord. For he is at the very presence of Jesus. And knowing how great, awesome, merciful, gracious and powerful and loving God is... No matter how strong the storm would get, no matter how big the waves grow, no matter how fierce the turbulence is, he can be assured that nothing will harm him. Jesus is Lord. He is God. Situations doesn't change who He is. He still sits at the right hand of the Father..

But there were times, like Peter, in the presence of danger, I easily feared and cried out, "Lord, save me! Help me!" I preferred to seek His hand.. it is not wrong to seek His hand. But maybe, asking for immediate salvation hindered God's very purpose.

To mature.

To increase my faith.

to endure.

to fix my eyes on Jesus...

and to overcome through a prayer, "Lord, give me the grace to stand and keep my eyes on You."

Because i know, when i keep my eyes on Jesus, when i behold His presence, His beauty, majesty and glory.. Jesus is enough for me. And even if the situation is difficult, nothing is too hard for the Lord. I only need to trust Him and fix my eyes on His face. At His presence is the safest place...

Lord, cause me to seek Your face and not Your hand...

1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. 2Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

kewl pixies

2008-07-23T17:43:00.008+08:00

i don't have a work now, so i spend most of my time at home in front of the pc, or cooking, other chores, you know.. some sort of things that a house buddy does. i'm into fotoshop.. i like to manipulate pictures.. make collage or artwork. most of the time my favorite subjects are my sibs. hehehe! i like to cut and paste their faces and do something new out of it.. my favorite theme is.. Star Drama Theater presents... hahaha! kewl pixies. kewl adobe.. i had just learned to make the images move..

this is my sister guia.. why it isn't loading yet?

ain't that cute!?

ate kay and kuya allan... dramatic..

arki days.. sigh..

i am really having fun.. but i guess i should start looking for a job now.. it's just that when i'm into something i just can't drop it.

well, that's not an excuse.. hmmm.. it's all about balance, right?!

amazed and speechless

2008-07-09T19:36:00.002+08:00

24To him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy— 25to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen.
Jude 1:24-25

Better Than I

2008-05-29T08:02:00.001+08:00

David Campbell

I thought I did what's right
I thought I had the answers
I thought I chose the surest road
But that road brought me here

So I put up a fight
And told you how to help me
Now just when I have given up
The truth is coming clear

You know better than I
You know the way
I've let go the need to know why
For you know better than I

If this has been a test
I cannot see the reason
But maybe knowing I don't know
Is part of getting through

I try to do what's best
And faith has made it easy
To see the best thing I can do
Is put my trust in you

For you know better than I
You know the way
I've let go the need to know why
For you know better than I

I saw one cloud and thought it was a sky
I saw a bird and thought that I could follow
But it was you who taught that bird to fly
If I let you reach me will you teach me

For you know better than I
You know the way
I've let go the need to know why
I'll take what answers you supply
You know better than I

Were It Not For Grace

2008-05-28T20:00:00.001+08:00

Larnelle Harris

Time measured out my days
Life carried me along
In my soul I yearned to follow God
But knew I’d never be so strong
I looked hard at this world
To learn how heaven could be gained
Just to end where I began
Where human effort is all in vain

Chorus

Were it not for grace
I can tell you where I’d be
Wandering down some pointless road to nowhere
With my salvation up to me
I know how that would go
The battles I would face
Forever running but losing this race
Were it not for grace

So here is all my praise
Expressed with all my heart
Offered to the Friend who took my place
And ran a course I could not start
And when He saw in full
Just how much His love would cost
He still went the final mile between me and heaven
So I would not be lost

Repeat Chorus

Forever running but losing this race
Were it not for grace

Plans

2008-05-28T09:00:00.001+08:00

Many are the plans in a man's heart,
but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.

Proverbs 19:21 (New International Version)

In his heart a man plans his course,
but the LORD determines his steps.

Proverbs 16:9 (New International Version)

The preparations of the heart belong to man,
But the answer of the tongue is from the LORD.

Proverbs 16:1 (New King James Version)

The LORD brings the counsel of the nations to nothing;
He makes the plans of the peoples of no effect.

Psalm 33:10 (New King James Version)

Commit to the LORD whatever you do,
and your plans will succeed.

Proverbs 16:3 (New International Version)

But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever,
the purposes of his heart through all generations.

Psalm 33:11 (New International Version)

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD,
"plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11 (New International Version)

Sovereignty

2008-05-27T20:11:00.003+08:00

The Lord does as He pleases
The Lord does as He chooses
Who is man to question Your ways?
For the Lord gives and takes away.

Man can plan, scheme and work
But God's hand can bless or make everything fall
The voice that thunders, shakes and roars
The same voice that quiets and calms the storm.

Beauty in Brokenness

2008-05-27T16:52:00.001+08:00

by Margaret Manning

Recently, I attended a retreat where there was a great deal of personal sharing. I sat amazed as I listened to women from every walk of life, most of whom were established Christians, share of heartache, pain, and various aspects of struggle they had either just come through, or were currently experiencing. I was overwhelmed by their honesty and by the poignancy of their stories. But even more than this, I was overwhelmed by the beauty radiating from within as they shared their stories.

Beauty in brokenness? Without glorifying suffering, there is an unexpected beauty that can shine through stories of struggle. One friend is a paraplegic broken in the use of her body, and yet she has a beautiful spirit. Not limited by her brokenness, she uses her own difficulties to help others, and teach others about true ability and disability. Tony Snow, the White House Press Secretary, considers his cancer a "calling" and in a recent article written in Christianity Today said, "We are fallen. We are imperfect. Our bodies give out. But despite this--because of it-–God offers the possibility of salvation and grace."(1) That possibility of salvation and grace is beauty in brokenness.

Somehow, uniquely, God desires to use those difficult moments of our lives to bring forth something extraordinarily beautiful. Even the natural creation attests to this truth. In fall, we marvel at the gorgeous, lush colors of burnt amber, burnished orange, brilliant red, and bright yellow leaves, even as that beauty belies the slow and gradual death of those leaves. Winter buries those leaves under the cold, dark blanket of snow and frost. And yet, death brings forth life. Spring bursts forth year after year with jonquils, iris, lilies, and all the beautiful pastels of new life.

During a time of deep despair and suffering, King David wondered about God's ability to be present in his dark places--to bring about beautiful redemption in the midst of brokenness. He cried out to God, "Will your lovingkindness be declared in the grave, your faithfulness in Abaddon? Will your wonders be made known in the darkness? And your righteousness in the land of forgetfulness?" (Psalm 88:11-12). David wondered about God's work in his life--had he been abandoned? Was God still guiding him even in the deepest, darkest places of brokenness and fear? And even in those places seemingly forgotten, would God continue to make things right? David struggled to see how beauty could emerge out of brokenness. And yet, he later affirmed in Psalm 139, "Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there... if I say, 'surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,' even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you." It is in those dark places of brokenness and suffering that God brings forth luminous light so that even the dark is illuminated.

The prophet Isaiah repeats this theme by promising one who would redeem the exiles, giving them "a garland of beauty instead of ashes" and "the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord... who summons you by name" (Isaiah 61:3, 45:3). Perhaps, these were Scriptures recalled by the apostle Paul when he declared that "we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the surpassing greatness of the power may be of God and not from ourselves; we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying about in the body the dying of Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body" (2 Corinthians 4:7-9). Indeed, Paul declares that "the God who said, 'Light shall shine out of darkness,' is the one who has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ" (4:6). And so often, that face of Christ is demonstrated with beautiful radiance through the broken and dark places in our lives.

Today, if you are experiencing hardship, difficulty or personal darkness, seek the light and beauty of Christ, for he longs to be present to you, to give you a garland of beauty instead of ashes, to call you by name, and to bring forth treasures of darkness. He is there in the brokenness with you.

Margaret Manning is associate writer at Ravi Zacharias International Ministries in Atlanta, Georgia.

Sovereignty

2008-05-27T16:27:00.001+08:00

The Lord does as He pleases
The Lord does as He chooses
Who is man to question His ways?
For the Lord gives and takes away.

Man can plan, scheme and work
But God's hand can bless or make everything fall
The voice that thunders, shakes and roars
The same voice that quiets and calms the storm.

Sad Monday

2008-04-28T18:39:00.001+08:00

I feel so sad today. We had the pre-board exam for building technology and I just know that I didn't do well. There were so many items I was oblivious of. I haven't seen my paper but I know that my grade won't even reach a passing rate. I feel so sad. I know in myself that there are so many things to study but what frustrates me is that I didn't study well. I read and studied, took long hours, but... it didn't work. I devoted my time in studying but it seemed like the information and answers were sands falling easily from my grip. parang aral ako ng aral pero konti lang pumapasok sa isip ko. Maybe I'm taking this review lightly. And I should not. Most of all I just realized that these past days, I barely talk to my Maker. Barely do I pray. Barely do I chew on His word. I was wrong to think that devoting almost all my time in my desk would do me good. I was really wrong. I forgot why I am even doing all these.

I deliberately gave God a cold shoulder because of all the things I am busy of. I forgot that He is my prime priority. That without His grace I could not go on. I drifted away and I failed and I did so many mistakes and sinned.

I really feel bad.

But I know that God will not leave me nor forsake me. I need to ask forgiveness...

mizpah

2008-04-16T22:00:00.002+08:00

Also Mizpah, because he said, "May the Lord watch between you and me when we are absent one from another.

Genesis 31:49

Ella

2008-03-30T06:06:00.001+08:00

We had a cell-group outing yesterday to Jala-Jala, Rizal. I and Anngelie were left in the jeep going to Cubao because the rest had alighted one by one as they reached their destinations. Unfortunately, instead of going straight to aurora boulevard, the jeep detoured and we took off at Araneta Center near Alimall. Well, that meant a long walk and i was so tired and sleepy that i actually grumbled. I even told myself, "oh no Lord, I'm so tired and now I have to do a long walk, seems i didn't get Your favor this time".

While roaming the streets of araneta center, I was reminded of the time I and Ella met there once. We just basically took a walk, chat about anything, about our faith, our families, friends, dreams, plans and being single (hahaha :p). It was fun, walking around with your best bud. It brought me a nice feeling to just be myself with my accountability partner. It's a blessing to have her, to have someone check on you and say "kumusta ka na ba?" with genuine concern and sometimes unexplainable grin. Ella is one of the people i can speak out my mind without worrying I might be judged. She is someone who is full of wisdom. She loves the Lord. When we were freshmen in college, I was curious about her. It was just that there was something different about her. She couldn't be persuaded to goof around. However, we were not close by then, actually, I didn't like her at first. But she was a light and salt to me. Maybe I just don't want to admit at that time because of pride but... i guess i really looked at her differently; not as a Jesus freak (but I know she doesn't care to be tagged like that, i guess she'll be honored hehe) or something but someone who has something that couldn't be taken away from her. And i wanted that.

We grabbed ourselves pansit palabok and halo-halo at Razon's. That was my first time and I really raved about it. T'was really good. That halo-halo had a few ingredients but it was so delicious. I remember someone approached as and asked us if we were interested to donate money for an org. We did not give hehe! we were planning to check if the org. is existent but I guess we totally forgot about it after that day.

Magaan kasama si Ella. I don't have to worry if she's bored or something. taga-tawa xa at taga simangot sa mga jokes ko. i can sit beside Ella without saying anything. that's perfectly okay. I laugh at her raves. i wow at her praise items. i pray with her with tears. i cry at her stories. i listen to her. sometimes i don't need to say a word. She just needs to be heard. i just had to listen to her heart.

I love Ella and i am missin' her a big deal. She should come back real soon. She must have a lot of things to say. Ü Well, I do to. hehehe! At kailangan niya na talaga bumalik kasi may mga gamit ako sa kanya. hehehe!

Naikot yata nmin ang Araneta Center twice. Di man lang namin namalayan. medyo lumalalim na ang gabi and we had to say our goodbyes and goodnights.Ü T'was a memorable time. T'was fun.

I realized that the favor of the Lord is indeed in me that time while walking there with anngelie (another close friend). I was thankful that that happened, the jeep detoured and took that walk in araneta center, stepping on the traces of my foot steps and Ella's. I'm forever thankful to God because i met Ella. God made a huge u-turn in my life because He used Ella to tell me all about His Son.

My Utmost For His Highest

2008-03-27T20:59:00.001+08:00

March 26, 2008

Spiritual Vision Through Personal Purity (1)

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God —Matthew 5:8

Purity is not innocence— it is much more than that. Purity is the result of continued spiritual harmony with God. We have to grow in purity. Our life with God may be right and our inner purity unblemished, yet occasionally our outer life may become spotted and stained. God intentionally does not protect us from this possibility, because this is the way we recognize the necessity of maintaining our spiritual vision through personal purity. If the outer level of our spiritual life with God is impaired to the slightest degree, we must put everything else aside until we make it right. Remember that spiritual vision depends on our character— it is "the pure in heart " who "see God."

God makes us pure by an act of His sovereign grace, but we still have something that we must carefully watch. It is through our bodily life coming in contact with other people and other points of view that we tend to become tarnished. Not only must our "inner sanctuary" be kept right with God, but also the "outer courts" must be brought into perfect harmony with the purity God gives us through His grace. Our spiritual vision and understanding is immediately blurred when our "outer court" is stained. If we want to maintain personal intimacy with the Lord Jesus Christ, it will mean refusing to do or even think certain things. And some things that are acceptable for others will become unacceptable for us.

A practical help in keeping your personal purity unblemished in your relations with other people is to begin to see them as God does. Say to yourself, "That man or that woman is perfect in Christ Jesus! That friend or that relative is perfect in Christ Jesus!"

- Oswald Chambers

Woe is me

2008-03-27T10:53:00.002+08:00

I SEE THE LORD

by Ron Kenoly

I see the Lord, I see the Lord
Exalted high upon the worship
Of the people of the earth
I see the Lord, I see the Lord
My eyes have seen the King
The Lamb upon the throne
Who reigns forever more

I see the Lord, I see the Lord
Exalted high upon the worship
Of the people of the earth
I see the Lord, I see the Lord
My eyes have seen the King
The Lamb upon the throne
Who reigns forever more

The train of his robe
Fills the temple
A cloud of heavenly worshipers
Surrounding HIs throne
We join with them now crying
"Holy, holy is the Lamb
The Lamb alone"

I see the Lord, I see the Lord
Exalted high upon the worship
Of the people of the earth
I see the Lord, I see the Lord
My eyes have seen the King
The Lamb upon the throne
Who reigns forever more

The train of his robe
Fills the temple
A cloud of heavenly worshipers
Surrounding HIs throne
We join with them now crying
"Holy, holy is the Lamb
The Lamb alone"

I see the Lord, I see the Lord
Exalted high upon the worship
Of the people of the earth
I see the Lord, I see the Lord
My eyes have seen the King
The Lamb upon the throne
Who reigns forever

... and ever
Forever and ever, Forever and ever
Forever and ever, Forever and ever
Forever and evermore
Forever more

My eyes have seen the king
The Lamb upon the Throne
Who reigns forever more

My eyes have seen the king
The Lamb upon the Throne
Who reigns forever more

- it's like hearing isaiah.

Seeing the glory of the Lord, His holiness, majesty and beauty unveils the true condition of the heart. A person has not truly worshipped if in God's presence he remains unchanged.

How pitiful is the plight of man. Just like Isaiah said, "Woe is me", for seeing the Lord, I see Him as He is and I see the true me. I see His greatness and His holiness. And I see my carnality and iniquity. But praise to the Lord forevermore for it is by His grace and compassion that He showed me a realistic view of the "self" and convicted my heart through the Holy Spirit. A contrite and repentant heart He requires. Praise to God because through His Son my sins were forgiven.

One day I just found myself walking and jumping up and down on the line next to sin. I was like a flipping coin ready to fall on the ground. I was like running along the cliff, ready to fall. I searched my heart and i saw the fleshly and sinful desires inside of me. Then, I realized that I sinned because in my heart I was wanting to sin.

It was like I was the one pushing myself. It was like I was the one tempting myself.

But God is gracious. He intervened.

I learned that a diminished view of God's holiness equals an inflated view of sin. Thanks to the Lord, because in His presence I was reminded of His holiness and righteousness. He is the standard not the world. It's easy to pretend and deceive others that I am living a consecrated life but God knows all things. I cried out to the Lord. I asked Him to never let me go. Because away from the knowledge of who he is a wide road to sin. Absence of true worship will make me indifferent and easy prey to the enemy. I pray that the Lord stir in my heart a genuine hatred for sin and that the fear of the Lord will come upon me.

Isaiah is Isaiah. But when He saw the glory of the Lord He was remorseful of His condition. He saw his sinful nature. But the Lord saw that he is contrite. The angel touched his lips with coal and declared that his sins were forgiven.

The Lord from His lofty throne asked "Who will go for us?"

Then Isaiah said "Here I am, send me."

If his sins were not forgiven, the Lord won't be able to use Him.

Only through a consecrated life will the world be convinced that we worship the only true God. If we are pure and holy, can God only use us for His glory.

Safest Place

2008-01-30T13:16:00.001+08:00

Keep me as the apple of the eye, hide me under the shadow of thy wings. Psalm 17:8

Where is the safest place?

Is it in the absence of danger?

Is it in a place of security?

A place of comfort?

Absence of hardships, toil and adversity?

Where is that place?

I would love to go to that place.

But if I would... what good would it do to me?

If everything is so easy, what would I gain?

What character would I develop?

What opportunities would I miss?

What great joy and reward would slip out of my hands because of fear, faithlessness, anxiety and cowardice?

I remember, when I was in my last year in college... i was toiling in my thesis. Then one day... out of distress and worry, i stopped and cried out. I told my ate that I couldn't do it anymore. I was losing hope. I was mentally drained, physically weak and spiritually thirsty. She told me, "Let it be an opportunity to trust in the Lord. It is Him who favors those who rest their hope and faith on him." I still have the sms in my inbox.

There are times I am downhearted. The cry of "self" is to stop enduring. But didn't Jesus said to His disciples "Take heart because I have overcome the world"?

There must be more than this. I am a child of God. He breathed on me His Spirit. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. But why amidst the adversity I tend to forget who I am. Who I am in Him. My position. I lose opportunity to claim what God had entrusted to me.

Where is the safest place then?

It is not in the absence of danger?

It is not in a place of security?

It is not in a place of comfort?

It is not in absence of hardships, toil and adversity?

It is beneath the shadow of His wings...

It is in the center of God's will...

It is at the foot of the cross...

It is in Jesus alone...

The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe. Proverbs 29:25

A Love Song for my Savior

2008-01-29T17:35:00.001+08:00

Sing (Your Love)

By Hillsong United

Album: More than Life (2004)

It used to be darkness

Without you

I lived my life in blindness

But now I am found

And I'll sing, sing I love you so

And I'll sing

Because the world can't take away

Your love

Found me in weakness

Broken

You came to me in kindness

And now I live

I'll give my life for you Lord

For all you've done

What comes from the Lord because it is impossible for humans to manufacture it? Wisdom. What comes from humans because it is impossible for the Lord to experience it? worry. And what is it that brings wisdom and dispels worry? Worship.

-Charles R. Swindoll

be strong

2008-01-26T15:21:00.001+08:00

Be strong in the Lord…

Ephesians 6:10

lamp unto my feet, light unto my path

2008-01-23T16:40:00.001+08:00

Lord, hindi ko na alam kung anu ang tama. It’s like i’ve committed a series of mistake. It’s like nasa gitna aq ng nag-uumpugang bato. All I need, Lord is you. You are the lamp unto my feet, the light unto my path. Your words are and you are alone. Lord, help me. Consecrate me. Direct my path. Guard my heart. Thank you Lord. Praise you Jesus.

where my treasure; where my heart is

2008-01-15T20:04:00.001+08:00

Lord Jesus, you’re my treasure. Restore me, bring me back to you. Blaze Spirit blaze! Set my heart on fire, that I may live according to Your decrees. That I may live my life to the full; that I may dwell on heavenly things; that I may focus my eyes on You…

unspeakable joy

2008-01-09T09:10:00.001+08:00

Lord, please create a new heart in me; a heart bursting in unspeakable joy. Lord, give me back the joy of my salvation.

like clay

2008-01-07T18:33:00.002+08:00

God said yesterday night, He wants me to be like the clay…

O house of Israel, cannot I do with you as this potter? saith the LORD. Behold, as the clay is in the potter's hand, so are ye in mine hand, O house of Israel.

Jeremiah 18:6

jeremiah 29

2008-01-06T20:49:00.002+08:00

Start of the year, start of decisions to make, start of paths to take and
start of struggle for me. am i really a melancholic type of person? i've
been so gloomy for the past several days. And it's all because i want my
own way. my plans are in contrast to what i last heard from God. i
couldn't completely obey God because i couldn't surrender to Him my plans.
I know that His will is the best for me but it's really hard.. it seems my
faith is being tested and i'm sad too because i could not delight in God's
will for me. But isn't it that "because He says so so I should believe?"